The world’s leading fashion lingerie house has announced the production of a new line entitled “Body Scan by Victoria.”
The latest lingerie is in response to body scans, set to enter airport screening areas across the world. This latest screening device is causing panic to both privacy advocates and private parts advocates.
“If the scanners are going to show us naked, we should look our sexiest,” said Victoria’s Secret Spokesperson Samantha Smythe.
Victoria’s Secret has purchased a body scanner so that designers, working side by side with scientists, can best create lingerie that offers the most flattering optical illusion.
The Body Scan line will include push up bras, minimizers, body shapers (gurdles), control top hose, and tape to cover any flaws (stretch marks, discoloration, etc).
The news of the new line was welcomed by the Obama administration.
“Body Scan by Victoria is not only innovative, but it is also patriotic,” said Secretary of Homeland Security Janet Napolitan. “The women wearing these undergarments will brighten the days of our hard working TSA force.”
Body Scan by Victoria should be available in stores, the catalogue and web site in time for Valentine’s Day.