On November 18, 2010, I saw on Facebook expressing grief over the death of Rusty Sneiderman. I read the posts for a few days, completely in denial that I had known Rusty when I was 18 years old. We went on a double date my freshman year of college.
After hanging out with him and his friend a couple of times, I never really talked to him, beyond a brief wave or a hello. I remember him dating Andrea and seeing them together at parties.
But that was a long time ago. I am not friends with either Rusty (may he rest in peace) or Andrea, however I have been following the coverage of his murder.
He seemed like a good guy and from the press everyone really loved him. They have two young children. The entire case is extremely tragic.
Rusty was killed by Andrea’s boss, who she was having some sort of relationship with. This was found to be true after a man hunt by police to see who would have shot point blank a father right after he dropped his child off at daycare.
Currently the assassin, Hemy Neuman’s fate is in a jury’s hands. He admits to the murder but claims he was insane.
Although Hemy is on trial, you would think by what happened in the courtroom and malicious Facebook posts and tweets that Andrea was being prosecuted.
Now let me make one thing clear. If Andrea had anything to do with her husband’s death, she should spend the rest of her life rotting in jail.
However, currently she is not indicted, yet both the prosecutor and the defense have insinuated that she has blood on her hands.
This method has been distasteful or possibly slanderous. There is also some degree of sexism. She was criticized by her reaction to her husband’s murder. I guess because she wasn’t a sobbing woman, she must have murdered her husband. Ridiculous. People have all sorts of reactions to tragedies. There’s no right way to respond. She was not a damsel in distress, but it doesn't mean she wasn’t devastated.
She is also being portrayed as the “black widow.” True, she won’t admit to the affair, although she does concede that parts of their relationship were inappropriate. Even just the imagery of a “black widow” is to add a fantastic element to the argument.
Another issue is when Andrea took the stand, she was a bit combative. This was also deemed to be abnormal behavior by the press and the public. Just because she’s a woman, does she have to sit on the stand like a wallflower and sob? Why is that so?
I also think that this entire strategy for the prosecution and defense of scapegoating Andrea could backfire. It might be difficult to convict Hemy if it’s unclear who was responsible for the murder.
Like I said before, I don’t know Andrea. But the coverage of this case and the lawyers’ tactics to scapegoat her has been melodramatic and a mockery of the justice system.
And if they know that she was involved, she should be charged with a crime, not be given the Scarlet Letter treatment.
No one knows what goes on in a marriage besides the couple. Being judgmental of her relationship is just unfair when we don’t have the entire picture. It sounds like she got involved with a psycho while she was married who ended up killing her husband, who was beloved by many.
While her behavior is morally problematic, it doesn't mean that she killed her husband, and if she didn’t kill her husband, the portrayal of her as a manipulative collaborator is terribly unfair.
………….My deepest condolences to Rusty’s family and friends. I hope the verdict will bring you some sense of closure. May Rusty’s memory be for a blessing