In a parallel universe....

September 10, 2010

East Jerusalem, Palestine

Palestine celebrated its 10th anniversary of statehood today. Fireworks and red and black balloons filled the streets of every major city celebrating what some said was an impossibility.

"Everyone assumed that Palestinians and Israelis could not make peace and resolve the conflict. This 10 year celebration proves otherwise," said U.S. President Barack Obama.

In attendance at the celebration were former U.S. presidents George Bush, Bill Clinton and Al Gore, the three were instrumental in the Oslo Accords. The newly elected leaders of Jordan, Egypt, Syria and Lebanon were also in attendance.

The world has marveled over Palestine's resurgence onto the world stage. After accepting the financial and political agreements confirmed in 2000 with Israel, Palestinians used the money funded by the EU, U.S. and Israel in return for land lost during the 1948 and 1967 wars to invest in science universities where the affordable electronic car was invented as well as, in corporation with Israel and Jordan, a new technique to purify salt water to provide freshwater for the desert region.

The Jewish settlements that were so controversial in 2000, were voluntarily dismantled (settlements that were heavily populated were annexed by Israel in agreement with the Palestinians), and settlers have now built houses in the northern and southern parts of Israel - accepting the land for peace agenda. The city of Sderot has grown to 500,000 people who are also pioneers in the new alternative energies from fuels. Other booming cities are Ashdod, Ashkelon and Beer Sheva.

The elected leaders of the Palestine announced today to the cheers of thousands that the Gaza West Back underground tunnel is being expanded to six lanes due to heavy traffic to and from Ramala to Gaza City.

Today also marks the fifth anniversary of the closing of the UN agency responsible for Palestinian refugees. The last refugee camp in Lebanon was closed on September 1, 2005.

Israel's Prime Minister Tzipi Livni was not in attendance at the anniversary celebration, but sent 10 dozen red roses as a good will gesture. Leaders of the Jewish State could not attend the celebration because the anniversary happens to fall on the first day of Rosh Hashanah. However in honor of the New Year, Livni announced that Israelis no longer have a mandatory draft, rather a choice of national service (before limited mostly to religious young women) which can be served in Israel or abroad or regular army service. The move should save Israel almost a billion dollars per year which it will invest in public schools to reduce class size.

As for the militant group Hamas, known for suicide bombings during the mid 1990s, their members have been mostly arrested or have joined other more moderate political parties in Palestine.

Anonymous reports from a Federal Prison official were that Osama Bin Laden was watching the celebrations from in jail cell in Arlington, Virginia where he has been since 2002.